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What moment was most definitive of who you are today?

 

12-10-14 09:20 AM
Singelli is Offline
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As we grow, we are always growing, changing, and (hopefully) seeking to improve ourselves. There is no doubt in my mind that we are -constantly- being redefined and figuring out exactly who we are.

Each of us has likely had many of those moments in the past, but I'm curious to know which was the most significant for you and brought about the most life change.  I'm also curious to see whose moments are 'positive', and whose are 'negative'.

Aside from my acceptance of Christ...

I don't really wish to go into great lengths of detail on mine. However, I will say that there were certain things I struggled with nearly all my teenage and adult life.  I could not battle these issues very effectively.  In January of the past year, I put myself in a very bad position and ended up going through something fairly bad.  The event shook me to the core, and I haven't struggled with those issues from my past hardly at all, since then.  Although it's probably too soon to say that the change is 'permanent', it's been almost a whole year that I've gone without the problems I consistently had for more than a decade.  To me, this is amazing. 

(I'm more interested in responses from us 'geezers', to be honest, but anyone is welcome to offer their own perspective.)
As we grow, we are always growing, changing, and (hopefully) seeking to improve ourselves. There is no doubt in my mind that we are -constantly- being redefined and figuring out exactly who we are.

Each of us has likely had many of those moments in the past, but I'm curious to know which was the most significant for you and brought about the most life change.  I'm also curious to see whose moments are 'positive', and whose are 'negative'.

Aside from my acceptance of Christ...

I don't really wish to go into great lengths of detail on mine. However, I will say that there were certain things I struggled with nearly all my teenage and adult life.  I could not battle these issues very effectively.  In January of the past year, I put myself in a very bad position and ended up going through something fairly bad.  The event shook me to the core, and I haven't struggled with those issues from my past hardly at all, since then.  Although it's probably too soon to say that the change is 'permanent', it's been almost a whole year that I've gone without the problems I consistently had for more than a decade.  To me, this is amazing. 

(I'm more interested in responses from us 'geezers', to be honest, but anyone is welcome to offer their own perspective.)
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(edited by Singelli on 12-10-14 12:37 PM)    

12-10-14 10:02 AM
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This thread has interested me, so I'll give the best response I can, despite being inexperienced in this world.

The (currently only) thing that has brought a lot of life change for me was when my mother fell ill a few years ago and passed last year.
She was always the only one at home to take care of me and my two cousins during schooldays, since my dad worked until late at night. When she fell ill and also needed to be taken care of, everyone just moved a space. My dad had to work harder than before to earn enough money to cover us, so we usually didn't see him at all on schooldays. I was the oldest at the time, so I found myself having to do almost all the stuff that was always done for me. Still got support from my mother wherever she could.

Now, almost a full year after she passed, all of this is pretty normal to me. My dad works from home now, so that already helps out quite a lot. I have noticed that I'm way closer to my close family than I used to be. One of my cousins recently entered puberty, so he can be quite the dork sometimes, but I love both of them to bits. Same goes with my dad, and also my dog that's been with us for like over 10 years now. Wouldn't want to trade them for anything in this world.

Then again, it's starting to have much less of an impact on my daily life now, which is good. Too young to be bothered by anything permanently. 
This thread has interested me, so I'll give the best response I can, despite being inexperienced in this world.

The (currently only) thing that has brought a lot of life change for me was when my mother fell ill a few years ago and passed last year.
She was always the only one at home to take care of me and my two cousins during schooldays, since my dad worked until late at night. When she fell ill and also needed to be taken care of, everyone just moved a space. My dad had to work harder than before to earn enough money to cover us, so we usually didn't see him at all on schooldays. I was the oldest at the time, so I found myself having to do almost all the stuff that was always done for me. Still got support from my mother wherever she could.

Now, almost a full year after she passed, all of this is pretty normal to me. My dad works from home now, so that already helps out quite a lot. I have noticed that I'm way closer to my close family than I used to be. One of my cousins recently entered puberty, so he can be quite the dork sometimes, but I love both of them to bits. Same goes with my dad, and also my dog that's been with us for like over 10 years now. Wouldn't want to trade them for anything in this world.

Then again, it's starting to have much less of an impact on my daily life now, which is good. Too young to be bothered by anything permanently. 
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12-10-14 12:09 PM
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Well, it's quite a long story but, shortly, what I am nowadays is the result, or the rebirth of my past, rather. Long time ago, I didn't feel so good. Failed romances over and over again, big troubles looking for a job, familial conflicts... even some bosses laughed at me when I came to apply to a job. I was weak and emotional. All that brings me to do the most terrible thing: I wanted to end everything. In my mind, it was like I was a failure, something that shouldn't have existed. And, during a party, I fell into a coma. The next day, I was at the hospital. When I opened my eyes, the scenery had changed. But I opened my eyes, like someone saved me and granted me another chance.

From that accident, I decided to fight, to become stronger. I'm still a bit emotional but I am now devoured by dedication, determination and arrogance. I want to prove what I really am. I decided to not let that second chance go. That's why I called that "the rebirth". I kept some stuff from my old personality and added new things to become a new person. People must deal with that new personality. I'm not going to change now. I can be nice and funny but I can become arrogant and kinda mean from time to time. That usually happens when I'm angry, frustrated and disappointed.

After all, we all have a part made of light and another part made of darkness.
Well, it's quite a long story but, shortly, what I am nowadays is the result, or the rebirth of my past, rather. Long time ago, I didn't feel so good. Failed romances over and over again, big troubles looking for a job, familial conflicts... even some bosses laughed at me when I came to apply to a job. I was weak and emotional. All that brings me to do the most terrible thing: I wanted to end everything. In my mind, it was like I was a failure, something that shouldn't have existed. And, during a party, I fell into a coma. The next day, I was at the hospital. When I opened my eyes, the scenery had changed. But I opened my eyes, like someone saved me and granted me another chance.

From that accident, I decided to fight, to become stronger. I'm still a bit emotional but I am now devoured by dedication, determination and arrogance. I want to prove what I really am. I decided to not let that second chance go. That's why I called that "the rebirth". I kept some stuff from my old personality and added new things to become a new person. People must deal with that new personality. I'm not going to change now. I can be nice and funny but I can become arrogant and kinda mean from time to time. That usually happens when I'm angry, frustrated and disappointed.

After all, we all have a part made of light and another part made of darkness.
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12-10-14 12:46 PM
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I don't know there is a single defining moment in my life.  Life is a long series of decisions and results that add to the current moment.  I could have had a defining moment in about a thousand different places and times that I know would have changed my situation if i went another direction.

If I hadn't made friends with a kid named Rich in 4th grade, I never would have gone to skating parties (he always made me go).
If I hadn't gone to skating parties, I never would have met a girl named Courtney.
If I didn't meet her, I wouldn't have gone to the fair with her to see her parents' restaurant station

I'll cut to the point: I met my now wife, because she was dating a cook at the restaurant owned by Courtney's parents.  I quit that job to go out with her instead of being stabbed by the cook and we ended up getting married many years later.

So many different things could have changed my life and it's the small stuff that makes all difference.

I think the most difinitive thing to make me me was the Marine Corps.  They honed my warrior spirit and they helped develop me into the person I am today.
I don't know there is a single defining moment in my life.  Life is a long series of decisions and results that add to the current moment.  I could have had a defining moment in about a thousand different places and times that I know would have changed my situation if i went another direction.

If I hadn't made friends with a kid named Rich in 4th grade, I never would have gone to skating parties (he always made me go).
If I hadn't gone to skating parties, I never would have met a girl named Courtney.
If I didn't meet her, I wouldn't have gone to the fair with her to see her parents' restaurant station

I'll cut to the point: I met my now wife, because she was dating a cook at the restaurant owned by Courtney's parents.  I quit that job to go out with her instead of being stabbed by the cook and we ended up getting married many years later.

So many different things could have changed my life and it's the small stuff that makes all difference.

I think the most difinitive thing to make me me was the Marine Corps.  They honed my warrior spirit and they helped develop me into the person I am today.
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12-12-14 05:45 PM
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That's an easy question. Before, I was someone with a lot of trouble to express himself and full of fears, thinking that I could handle the world all by myself. But I was wrong, so wrong.

The year is 2008. It was a good year for me, attending a performance of Jean Michel Jarre, the best musician, composer and anything similar in the world, and I accomplished a childhood dream that I'll keep for myself for now. But not everything was that good.

First, there was a visit to the operating room, nothing important at that time. Then, by the end of the year, I started to not feel good. I couldn't explain why, and the solutions everybody gave me didn't work. Day after day, constantly feeling pain, nobody being able to tell what was happening to me, I failed into depression. The following year was even worse, and the thought of suicide was recurrent n my head.

Then, an extreme measure was taken. I got hospitalized for a week, and after many tries, they finally diagnosed me Crohn's disease. After more than a year, I finally heard real solutions, and I started to feel good again. Thanks to this, I opened myself a little bit to my classmates, and for the first time, I felt I wasn't alone. It was then when I realized that being alone made me weak against my disease, so I started to make friends anywhere. 

Now, I've discarded the old me. Everything I did or happened until I was diagnosed is nonexistent to me. The only things I keep are the little friends I made back then and the good experiences, like the ones mentioned earlier. My current me hasn't got that many fears or troubles, and is even decided to craft his own future. And the best way to start opening myself a little bit maybe is to make people know me better through posts and threads like this.
That's an easy question. Before, I was someone with a lot of trouble to express himself and full of fears, thinking that I could handle the world all by myself. But I was wrong, so wrong.

The year is 2008. It was a good year for me, attending a performance of Jean Michel Jarre, the best musician, composer and anything similar in the world, and I accomplished a childhood dream that I'll keep for myself for now. But not everything was that good.

First, there was a visit to the operating room, nothing important at that time. Then, by the end of the year, I started to not feel good. I couldn't explain why, and the solutions everybody gave me didn't work. Day after day, constantly feeling pain, nobody being able to tell what was happening to me, I failed into depression. The following year was even worse, and the thought of suicide was recurrent n my head.

Then, an extreme measure was taken. I got hospitalized for a week, and after many tries, they finally diagnosed me Crohn's disease. After more than a year, I finally heard real solutions, and I started to feel good again. Thanks to this, I opened myself a little bit to my classmates, and for the first time, I felt I wasn't alone. It was then when I realized that being alone made me weak against my disease, so I started to make friends anywhere. 

Now, I've discarded the old me. Everything I did or happened until I was diagnosed is nonexistent to me. The only things I keep are the little friends I made back then and the good experiences, like the ones mentioned earlier. My current me hasn't got that many fears or troubles, and is even decided to craft his own future. And the best way to start opening myself a little bit maybe is to make people know me better through posts and threads like this.
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12-23-14 11:11 PM
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Probably for me, in the short time I have been on this earth,  was when my grandmother passed away nearly two years ago. It may not seem like much of a "definitive" moment, but we are a tight knit family. I still remember the day vividly. I was sitting on the school bus waiting to go home when I saw my mother walking alongside it. Nan had been sick for a few weeks and we(me, my siblings and cousins) were told to "prepare ourselves." I knew when I saw mom what had happened.  It was the first real experience of grief and bereavement we had suffered. 
RIP Mary O Dowd 1928-2013
Probably for me, in the short time I have been on this earth,  was when my grandmother passed away nearly two years ago. It may not seem like much of a "definitive" moment, but we are a tight knit family. I still remember the day vividly. I was sitting on the school bus waiting to go home when I saw my mother walking alongside it. Nan had been sick for a few weeks and we(me, my siblings and cousins) were told to "prepare ourselves." I knew when I saw mom what had happened.  It was the first real experience of grief and bereavement we had suffered. 
RIP Mary O Dowd 1928-2013
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12-24-14 05:14 AM
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I usually have a lot to say about everything but this time I can honestly say I do not know. I haven't really thought about a true definitive time in my life. I've made great changes but I don't see them as all that super. I've been down on my dumps and will probably be down again at some point but when I get back up I don't go "This is the new me, I will be so much better now." I never get that. I just see my life in a chronological order and I think because of that, because I always have a view of where I will be and not be naive about it has something to do with it. I really don't like Drake (the crappy rapper who didn't start from the bottom) but he did say he will have 25 million by the time he is 25. I have visions like that, not goals per se but just a place I see myself. I am not going to sell my soul like Drake did to achieve what I want so if I don't achieve X at Y time, it is okay. I am only old if I stop being young.

Hmm okay scratch that. Maybe that was the 'moment' now that I think about it. I actually find myself being more successful and happier ever since I came to that realization. I always say, "You are only old if you stop being young." Yep I am self centered for quoting myself. Maybe others think the same. Maybe someone said this before already word for word, I don't care. Truly, I live by that quote. This doesn't mean I go YOLO because if I am a pop song and I live everyday like it is my last, I know one day it will be my last. I rather adopt, OLOY - Only losers obey Yolo lol. Ever since I had that mentality, life just seems so much more simple. All I got to do is not be old. Easy for me to say since I am only 24 but I want this mentality forever. I know this old guy from a dispensary that I used to visit. He is lean and tough. I can run a 10k and a half marathon if I train, but this guy can do the same and then kick the ass of any baddies who will try to rob his tired body after. He is definitely not old. I want to be like that. I want to be young forever in the soul. I plan on skydiving when I am 90...Everyone should have this mentality. 
I usually have a lot to say about everything but this time I can honestly say I do not know. I haven't really thought about a true definitive time in my life. I've made great changes but I don't see them as all that super. I've been down on my dumps and will probably be down again at some point but when I get back up I don't go "This is the new me, I will be so much better now." I never get that. I just see my life in a chronological order and I think because of that, because I always have a view of where I will be and not be naive about it has something to do with it. I really don't like Drake (the crappy rapper who didn't start from the bottom) but he did say he will have 25 million by the time he is 25. I have visions like that, not goals per se but just a place I see myself. I am not going to sell my soul like Drake did to achieve what I want so if I don't achieve X at Y time, it is okay. I am only old if I stop being young.

Hmm okay scratch that. Maybe that was the 'moment' now that I think about it. I actually find myself being more successful and happier ever since I came to that realization. I always say, "You are only old if you stop being young." Yep I am self centered for quoting myself. Maybe others think the same. Maybe someone said this before already word for word, I don't care. Truly, I live by that quote. This doesn't mean I go YOLO because if I am a pop song and I live everyday like it is my last, I know one day it will be my last. I rather adopt, OLOY - Only losers obey Yolo lol. Ever since I had that mentality, life just seems so much more simple. All I got to do is not be old. Easy for me to say since I am only 24 but I want this mentality forever. I know this old guy from a dispensary that I used to visit. He is lean and tough. I can run a 10k and a half marathon if I train, but this guy can do the same and then kick the ass of any baddies who will try to rob his tired body after. He is definitely not old. I want to be like that. I want to be young forever in the soul. I plan on skydiving when I am 90...Everyone should have this mentality. 
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12-28-14 03:27 AM
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I apologize if this offends anyone. I must say that the person (I say person because every day I am connected to this person is changing me. I can't name 1 event) that struck me to the core and has changed me and continues to change me in every way is Jashi.... The person in my heart.... Their really are no words to describe him... When I explain who he is.... It will never cover everything. He... Has kept me out of doubt, kept me from death, kept me from becoming the hermit, kept me from going homeless, keeps me dreaming, keeps me breathing, keeps me thinking, he has me in his grasp of life, he is my life, he is my universe, he thickens my skin, he makes me titanium, he hardens my views, he softens my empathy at the same time, we struggle together, we think together, yet independent at heart, he worries me and I worry him, yet we are comforted by each others strengths, from the moment we made contact he persistently insisted I was the one when I brushed him from my heart, I fell in love and I wont know what will happen when we physically can't make contact anymore until that moment comes, in cry if the thought even crosses my mind, he is me.... That's why I am who I am today and longer than forever be the way I will be.
I apologize if this offends anyone. I must say that the person (I say person because every day I am connected to this person is changing me. I can't name 1 event) that struck me to the core and has changed me and continues to change me in every way is Jashi.... The person in my heart.... Their really are no words to describe him... When I explain who he is.... It will never cover everything. He... Has kept me out of doubt, kept me from death, kept me from becoming the hermit, kept me from going homeless, keeps me dreaming, keeps me breathing, keeps me thinking, he has me in his grasp of life, he is my life, he is my universe, he thickens my skin, he makes me titanium, he hardens my views, he softens my empathy at the same time, we struggle together, we think together, yet independent at heart, he worries me and I worry him, yet we are comforted by each others strengths, from the moment we made contact he persistently insisted I was the one when I brushed him from my heart, I fell in love and I wont know what will happen when we physically can't make contact anymore until that moment comes, in cry if the thought even crosses my mind, he is me.... That's why I am who I am today and longer than forever be the way I will be.
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