I do, indeed, have a twin sister. We are not identical, though. We are fraternal - in both looks and personality. People do not seem to understand that, though. For the misleading term, 'twin', is to blame for the reason the two of us are regarded as nothing more than two halves of a whole. We are always mentioned together and mistaken for each other despite the fact that we are nothing alike. Why? That damned word: twin. My local people's ignorance is far beyond my understanding. A few weeks ago, we had a new student in class. Out of curiosity, I asked her if my sister and I looked similar, without mentioning a word of our sisterhood. She looked at us. "Nothing alike." What about later? After those scumbag classmates of mine told her she was my twin? "Exactly the same." How dull-minded people are in my community is enough to laugh at, not in my case, though. It hurts. In the morning, when my teacher takes attendance, seeing only one of our faces is enough for her to determine that both of us are present. When she reads our names aloud, it's always '... and ...' Never mentioned individually. People don't consider the fact that we're separate individuals. We are always delivered 'in the same package.' According the people I know, we are always in the same mood, have the same opinion on everything, share all the same interests, have the same strengths and weaknesses and look the same, too. We are always offered the same meals, given identical presents, being told the same things, and taken to the same places. Whenever my friend invites me over to her place, my mom tells the both of us, "You two have fun there!" As if it's automatic. If someone is inviting me over to her place, it's only logical she's inviting my sister, right? Wrong. Don't get me wrong, I love my sister dearly, but the way we're seen together is ticking me off. In fact, I am rarely ever called by my name anymore. It's always, always, "Hey, girls!" Throughout my life, I have been scarred much more painfully emotionally than physically. This twin thing makes up a large part of that scar. I'm not seen a person by anyone anymore. Being pampered the same way as my twin leads me to feel like I don't even have a life. I cried through writing this whole thing. And, I'm still crying now. It's enough to make me consider thinking about life again. And what it's worth.

NintendoFanKimmy : Hey Kimmy. As a twin myself (and a fraternal one at that), I feel I can weigh in on your situation. I'm 26.5 years old, and me and my twin look nothing alike. We have no similar interests, our moral values are completely opposite, and we are on completely different intellectual levels. However, we took the same classes, hung around the same people, went to the same places, had the same birthday parties, were given the same presents, etc etc.

Why view it as a curse? You have a -best- friend by your side throughout the entire thing. Even if you fight, think about this: No one will -ever- know you better than she does. She's been through the same things, experienced the same opinions thrown her way, and is around you the most. Sibling rivalry will always be there. In fact, for you two, the rivalry may be a little more painful because of -how- close you are. However, don't let other people's opinions define who you are. You're different people, and it should be enough for you to know that. My mother always told her children something very important: "I'm not comparing you to the standards of the world, but I'm holding you up to my own standards, in our own household." Don't be put down by the fact that the world expects one thing, while you know the opposite to be true. Why? The un-twinned world knows nothing of the experience. It's difficult for them to fathom, and they see twinhood as this marvelous and unique thing. If they lump you two together and it bothers you, gently tell them; don't get frustrated. If they continue to see you two together... just turn the other cheek. It's nothing worth crying over, Kimmy. *hugs*

I'm sure your mother loves you two more than anything. Can you imagine how excited she was when she got the news that she would be blessed with not ONE, but TWO healthy babies? I bet her joy exceeded any other she's felt in her life. For her, to call the both of you 'hey, girls!', is just a reminder of how blessed she is. I'm sure she has no idea it bothers you. Why would she think calling her girls affectionately together, hurts them? My mother would call us 'Hey girls!', and there were three girl children in the house..... it might not even have anything to do with you being twins.

Try this: as frightening as it might be, sit down with your mother and tell her your feelings. Mothers are the best people in the world for taking care of our hurts. I guarantee you her nurturing side will likely want to help you feel better by implementing some small changes in your house. Don't be afraid to speak to her.

A twin is a blessing Kimmy, though it might be difficult! Embrace it and forget about the ignorance of others. I say ignorance in the simple meaning of the word, not as an insult. They don't know any better, and they're taking the information the best they know how, since they haven't experienced such a relationship themselves.

NintendoFanKimmy : Well Kimmmy I only know you as you .. not a half of something or someone . But it's just the way things work ... I have a lil bro .. sure we look nothing alike cuz I am 3 years older and taller but we have still been asked the same question .. " Are you twins ? " ... I don't get irritated ... just say " No but were brothers " .. though he get irritated . Y'see once you lets people's interpretation govern who you are or even who you think you are ... its not gonna be good ... you decide who you are ... not ur mom , dad , society or ur twin . And maybe if you hung out less .. like separate for a lil bit with ur sis .. folks will only see you as one .. I mean .. thy can't say " You two " if it's only one they see ...  .  Besides .. in the future I bet you'll look even more nothing alike than now . It'll all take some time .  We get similar clothes and gifts .. but my personality is WAY different than him .. my appitite is way different than him . So I have many things that I use to separate me from him .... besides the age difference .  So just keep being who you are and folks will see the diff sooner or later :3 

Aww Kimmy! Don't be sad! Me and my sister are really close with a lot of things.. and I know how you feel a little sense me and my sister were called twins and look a likes one time! Don't cry! It will be okay!




Bintsy<33