I came across this the other day on facebook. I can't remember who linked to it but it's an interesting read. Makes the rape situation a bit easier to understand from a male perspective.






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geeogree : I think I'm more confused than before lol, jk. So what's going on is that the victim is being blamed for the crime? I was unaware that women faced such questioning and scrutiny before.

Edit: Sorry about that, I mean when it came to rape as I was under the impression that the law usually sides with the women in these types of crimes.

NotJon : rape is actually one of the most difficult crimes to prove. More often than not women get blamed for putting themselves into a bad circumstance (be that true or not) and most of the blame is put on to the women rather than placing it where it belongs. Sure, there are factors within a woman's control that can mitigate the risk of being raped and prevent themselves from being victims but in the end it's not the woman's fault that a man raped her.

a lot of politicians have controvercialy said things like theyre asking to be raped by dressing like a w****
that effectively underlines the fact many people in the trials have a bias and it is wrong.
the idea of the burqa in islam is that if a women shows skin she is provoking the man to rape her and that its her fault, and thats she has wronged the man by making him sin.
in africa a lot of blame is put on rape victims, and the husbands often leave the victim who is shunned by there relatives and village.
And even in the western world many just make the assumption that women are lying, that it wasnt forced etc.obviously you cant just assume that the guy did it, you need a fair trial but you should be going into the trial with an open mind, allowing the evidence to decide your opinion, often thats not the case.
as for the way some people act/dress being blamed for the rape, thats like a burglar saying "he had his door/window open, so i thought he was ok with me coming in and helping myself.its stupid, youre effectively saying if you fail to defend yourself you get no help.so then whats the point of the courts and the police?hypocrisey is rife.

rant over

thenumberone : like I said.... it's the difference between mitigating risk and placing blame properly.

Women can do quite a few things to help prevent this from happening and they should. That's not to say it would be their fault if they didn't, but it's like putting an alarm on your house. If it helps to prevent a burglary then it's probably worth doing. Doesn't change the fact that if you didn't have one that it's your own fault for having someone break into your house.

In the end I feel it comes down to a change of philosophy. I'm not sure where we got the idea that mean have the right to satisfy themselves sexually regardless of who they hurt in the process.

I had to read this many times to understand the message. I agree with the basic message, and what people have replied so far, but I'd like to give the justice system a fighting chance: Yes, rape is wrong. Yes, the rapist is ultimately responsible for his/her actions. But trials such as these wouldn't be so controversial if so many people haven't lied about it before. It's common for people to come onto false accusation when the supposed victim didn't get their way, so they claim sexual harassment or rape. 

All I can really say is agreed. When you put yourself out on display like that you are going to have people interested in you.

It is no different than putting up and ad for something and then when you get a response getting mad. Do not put it out there if it is not 'for sale'.

billythekidmonster : It isn't the same. Getting mad at getting hit on when dressing sexy, yes then that analogy works. But not for getting raped. If you want to use the advertising analogy, it's like putting an ad out for selling a lamp, and then a guy shows up to your house, busts down your door, takes the lamp. your tv, laptop, xbox, and a bunch of other stuff.

In legal terms, a woman can make the claim of rape as long as she said "no" at some point. However, proving it is so difficult because of the cultural bias, displayed perfectly by Billy, that 90% of rapes go unreported. Usually the only ones that do are the really violent ones where there was no doubt that rape is what happened.

"In legal terms, a woman can make the claim of rape as long as she said "no" at some point."


I personally hate this definition. Although, it's really the only way to give women some sort of legal protection against rape. It's just unfortunate that it gets used as a form of entrapment all too often.

geeogree : I totally agree. Especially because it also furthers the stereotype that if a woman is reporting rape, that she is probably just going for the entrapment. It's partially why I didn't report either of the times that it happened to me.

By the end of this I couldn't help but laugh. I'm horrible.

The whole thing was odd.

The last 4 parts were the best... so was when the cop said "word"

legacyme3 : Yeah, that last part made me laugh, too. I'd seen this on Facebook before, and I think I even reposted it... but it didn't have those last two lines. This one is much better.

legacyme3 : yeah, I laughed at the end too.... but I also felt like it made a really good point about rape and how it's treated compared to other crimes.

geeogree : It does make a really good point. No one really thinks just how ridiculous it is until they see the same treatment applied to another crime and then they are like "wtf, that is so stupid!"

And it is stupid. It really is.

Speaking of rape, I bet the officer enjoys rapping criminals for cash that is how he stays in business. He puts the man in cuffs, talk dirty to him and read him his rights while the officer proceeds to stick him with a nightstick in the back of a jail cell.

fightorace : The part that most of us four humorous was the last two lines.

I'm a rape victim myself, and I admit that I still laughed at that last part. Also, there is the schadenfreude aspect to seeing a man suffer the same problem.

The thing that this little post doesn't really address though is societies take as a whole. Yeah it has the officer kinda talking about it, but it's still mostly the law opinion. It doesn't have the reaction of others thinking the same thing, like the wife leaving the guy because he "gave away money" or anything like that.